UPDATE: After more thorough research (made difficult by the fact that many of the principals have blocked me), I have removed a few tweets from the Chirpstory. (Frankly, I find it ironic that so many people would want to distance themselves from Jessica all of a sudden.) I have also added previously unseen tweets by two longtime @Shoq antagonists to the slideshow. ALSO: Many thanks to Karoli for saying what needed to be said.
Remember when Jessica Delahunty @vdaze was so mad at her ex-boyfriend Matt Edelstein @Shoq that she felt compelled to spend months denouncing him on Twitter? Sure, they were cyber-lovers who had never actually met, but the affair was no mere “Twitter drama” to Jessica. His cancer, on the other hand, is a source of much amusement for her. When his diagnosis was confirmed several weeks ago, many of his close friends already knew that his doctor had been alarmed by test results for quite some time. But Jessica and friends pounced on the diagnosis, making light of his condition with vile suggestions and slanders.
Jessica has become the patron saint of a shrinking, yet dedicated Twitter cult whose creation story centers on @Shoq as a cartoonish Satan. More than one observer has come around to the realization that she is never actually going to get past him and move on. How could she, when relentlessly and obsessively mocking him in her stream wins so much love and affection from her friends as well as his longtime political opponents?
The latest example came on Tuesday after @Shoq went under a surgeon’s knife to have a tumor removed. When he emerged from the operation to announce that his surgeon had successfully removed the tumor, and had seen no evidence of further malignant tissue, Jessica’s disappointment turned into denial: he was lying about his cancer!
Jessica took an extra-long lunch hour to get past her disappointment at his survival. She has kept her tweets protected, confining access to a trusted circle, but one of her disillusioned followers recently provided me with their password, allowing us all to see Jessica play Orly Taitz for the “cancer truthers.” Here’s a slideshow:
I’ve also put together a Chirpstory of The Jessica Cult dogpiling a man in the recovery room. The best proof that @Shoq has survived an honest battle with mortality is that he actually doesn’t give a damn about what they say. But two of his friends jumped in to defend him and were swiftly condemned as haters — because who are we to question their divine hate for @Shoq and his fake cancer? You can read the Chirpstory here.Click here for reuse options!
Copyright 2013 Osborne Ink